My thoughts on stakeholder communication
Early in my career, while onboarding a stakeholder to our product, I encountered a lesson I'll never forget. I walked into her office to lead the training, introduced myself, and confidently declared, 'I'll teach you how to use our software to solve your problems.' She paused, looked at me strangely, and replied, 'I don't have any problems.'
She was right. She hadn't chosen our software—her company had. To her, it wasn't a solution; it was a mandate. I'd started the relationship on the wrong foot, assuming problems she didn't feel. That moment taught me two foundational lessons:
- Stakeholders are people first—with their own priorities, pressures, and perceptions.
- Words matter. Poorly chosen words can fracture a relationship, while thoughtful ones can gain you allies.
The PM's tightrope: aligning needs without burning bridges
Working in product means building solutions while constantly balancing:
- Business priorities (What drives growth? What's sustainable?)
- Stakeholder requests ("We need this feature yesterday!")
- User needs (What actually solves problems?)
Every item on the list revolves around communication. The hardest part? You can't say yes to everyone. But how you say "no" defines your credibility, relationships, and ultimately, your product's success.
The art of "no" (without closing doors)
When stakeholders—whether internal (sales, customer success, executives) or external (users, clients)—push for a feature, a PM's job isn't to shut them down. It's to align expectations. There are countless variables at play, and most depend on company context: stage (early-stage vs. scaling vs. enterprise), resources, strategy, and user needs. So, I believe there's no one-size-fits-all answer—but if I could guide my younger self, here's what I'd focus on when navigating these conversations:
- Anchor to vision: "This request doesn't align with our long-term roadmap, but here's what we're building next that might address your underlying need…"
- Data over drama: "We've prioritized initiatives impacting 80% of users first. Let's revisit this if demand grows."
- Trade-offs, not rejections: "We can't build this now, but here's a workaround using existing features."
- Leave room for evolution: "This isn't feasible today, but we'll track demand and reassess next quarter."
Why "no" isn't forever
Years ago, I told a stakeholder their niche reporting tool wasn't scalable. 18 months later, similar requests piled up—so we built it. The lesson? Closing doors breeds resentment. Explaining your 'no'—and leaving them open—builds trust for the long haul.
Steve Jobs said it best
"People think focus means saying yes to the thing you've got to focus on. But that's not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas."
Focus isn't about ignoring stakeholders—it's about guiding them to the "why" behind your "no."
Key takeaways
- Start with empathy: Understand their problems before pitching solutions.
- "No" is a strategic tool: Frame it around shared goals, not limitations.
- Trust > transactions: Leave room for future possibilities—today's "no" could be tomorrow's priority.